Cost-Cutting Wedding Tips For Your Next Nuptial

  1. Ask your local gravedigger if there are any groups of prom-goers who died tragically on their way to the dance they’d let you exhume for tuxedos: Matching tuxes for all your groomsmen? Yeesh, who has the time to coordinate that? This handy tip is a great way to take a load off everyone’s mind while clearing up some space in a local graveyard—it’s a win/win! For a nominal fee, most gravediggers are more than happy to dig up anything you ask them to! They’re weird as hell and poorly socialized.
  2. Rent—don’t buy—your priest: I know, I know; it’s good to support small businesses. But if you don’t absolutely need to buy a priest, you’re better off renting a used one from your local parish. The average priest uses about $2,000 in litter and priest food a month and can live to be upwards of 130 years old, and that’s just not something a young couple should be thinking about. Plus you’ll need to hire someone to watch them when you go honeymooning.
  3. Shave off all your body hair: This one is technically a twofer: one, less hair means less drag, meaning you can cut precious minutes of your ceremony, meaning you’re technically getting more for your money. Secondly, I know I guy who pays top dollar for hair–even the downstairs stuff. No. questions. asked.
  4. Get married in ape church: Apes don’t understand human currency, so you can basically pay them in anything. Just make sure to bring your own priest or you’ll end up taking a permanent vacation to the jungle.
  5. Don’t get upsold on magicians: A wedding planner, even one that you trust, is really only looking out for their bottom line. Yes, they want you to have an unforgettable wedding, but they also want you to spend a lot of money on things, including multiple magicians. This is a common testing point for planners, and if you cave on magicians, you’ll cave on just about anything else they suggest. Don’t fall for it. You only need one magician in order to distract the devil—everything else is just superfluous.
  6. Offer to be the understudies for a more famous Broadway wedding, then poison them: Pretty self-explanatory. Just make sure you’ve got your dosage right or your betrothed might end up marrying a West End star while you wait in the wings, glossy with envy.
  7. Put a lot of anime on your gift registry: Anime is expensive as hell, so the more of it you can get other people to give you for free the better it’s going to be for you down the road.

See : How to Plan a Wedding Ceremony? | Tips and Tricks – Smart Wedding

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